Origins

       A long time ago, in a galaxy not so far away... There lived a man named Cody Leach. Tired of a mundane life of university studies and working as a simple salesman, he dared to dream of something more. One day he met a like minded fellow named Cristian Garcia. He too had a thirst for adventure. The two men set out on a journey that would forever change their lives, and dare I say, the world as well.     

      The men knew they would need a companion, someone who could not only help them with the advanced electronics and sorcery they would surely face, but also someone who would eat all of their food, and lounge lazily around when their was work to be done. Asking around the local cantinas, Cody and Cristian always heard whispers of a man known only as "The Producer." The two adventurers explored the land to no avail until one day, weary from a day of searching they returned to their lair to find a strange man in unusual clothes sleeping on their couch.  That man was Producer Bryan. The duo explained to Bryan that the world needed to hear their story, the masses needed to be introduced to the world of Nerdom and it would take all three of them to do it, to which the Producer replied, "I'm down."       

     And so it was that Nerds With Friends was created. The three adventurers worked together to bring joy and laughter to those around them, spinning tales of heroes and their victories, making nerds everywhere feel safe and free to obsess over the most guilty of pleasures, and reminding them that they were not alone. But where there is peace there are those who would disrupt that peace.        

     One day, Bryan disappeared. Cristian and Cody looked in all of his usual hiding spots: Chipotle, Wholefoods, even the local sweater shop, but he was nowhere to be found. The Nerds were worried. They needed their Producer or their words would be forever silenced. Cristian remembered a wise man they met in their travels named Seamus Calder, a man who may be able to help them find their missing Producer. Upon approaching Seamus, the wise man greeted the Nerds with open arms. "I knew you would come," he said, "for I am one of you, and I shall help you find your friend."        

     And so the Nerds were a trio again and they set off to the Land of Angels to find the friend that was taken from them. Seamus fit in well with the group and what started as a temporary partnership soon grew into something more. Seamus was right, he was indeed one of the Nerds. As the Nerds traversed far and wide searching for their trusty Producer, they began to piece together the story of what happened to young Bryan.        An evil sorcerer disguised as a tea merchant lured poor Bryan to the Land of Angels with promises of riches greater than he could have possibly imagined. There were no riches to be had however. The tea merchant wanted Bryan's producing power for himself and he would stop at nothing to take it all for himself, but he did not know that the Nerds would come for him.        

     The Nerds used their powers of influence to investigate the land until they found the secret hideout of the evil tea merchant. Seamus used his super intellect to persuade the guard that he had indeed seen the droids he was looking for around the corner, and the Nerds were able to sneak in unnoticed. Inside the Nerds faced a labyrinth the likes of which had never been seen before, but the Nerds would stop at nothing to reclaim their friend. Cristian used his set of magic paints to create doors where there were none, and the Nerds easily made their way to the center of the maze.        

     At the center the Nerds found their Producer in chains, but as they rushed to his aid, the sorcerer appeared! "Fools!" he roared, "The Producer's power is mine, and mine alone!" And with a flick of his magic tea-scepter, the Nerds were thrown to the ground. Now it was Cody's turn. Using the art of Beard-Kata Cody used his Ki to grow his beard to superhuman lengths and was able to restrain the tea sorcerer. With a tilt of his chin Cody used a beard tendril to rip the scepter from the bound hands of the sorcerer. Seamus grabbed the scepter from Cody's beard and used it to release the chains that held Bryan. The tea-sorcerer was weakened without his magic staff, but was still too strong for Cody's mighty beard, and with a dazzling explosion of energy, he freed himself from his hairy prison. The Nerds were dazed but now they were whole again, and with four members, they were more powerful than ever before! "Bryan, we need your help!" Cody shouted, "We need your producer power!" Bryan pressed his hands together, palm to palm, and replied "I'm down!" A glowing orange orb surrounded Bryan and began to pulse. Then, a beam of light shot out to each of the Nerds.     

     Cristian's pallet of magic paints began to change form and grow a long handle, reshaping itself into a mighty battle axe. "This should do nicely," Cristian laughed, brandishing his new weapon.        

     A second beam hit Seamus who was still holding the sorcerer's scepter. The magic staff flattened, and morphed into a broad sword. Seamus gave a couple twirls of his wrist, the sword leaving trails of sparks as it arced through the air, and gave a nod of approval towards Bryan.        

     The last beam shot Cody square in the face, and two long tendrils grew out of his beard. At the end of each length of beard, jagged blades appeared. Cody took a tendril in each hand and spun the blades around him in huge sweeping arcs, each length of beard lengthening and shortening to his will. "Ahhhh yeahhh," Cody sneered, "Daddy like."          

     When the Nerds turned to look at their companion, Producer Bryan had a new weapon himself. Glowing orange in each of Bryans hands were twin Katanas made of pure energy. "If there's one thing I know, it's how to produce," Bryan laughed.          

     Seeing the Nerds with their newfound powers, he new he could not win. Together the Nerds were just too strong. Using all of his remaining energy, he conjured a portal. "You Nerds haven't seen the last of me!" he screeched as he jumped into the portal, disappearing in a cloud of steam.            

     The Nerds had beaten the tea-sorcerer, together they were stronger than ever and their new team of four would make them unstoppable. They returned to their lair, and Nerds With Friends was whole again. Now they live simpler lives, using their powers to make people laugh and overanalyze stories and films. There is peace for now, but the Nerds lay waiting for a time when they are needed again. If evil returns the Nerds will rise again as one and make the world remember that they are not alone, they're with friends, this is Nerds With Friends.

Cody Leach

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Seamus

Calder

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Cristian Garcia

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© 2018 Nerds With Friends 

A podcast for nerds by nerds.

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